Shelly brought us back these sweet sucker fruits for lunch today.
to me they tasted like jolly rancher cobwebs, and gave me the sensation that i was sheep a’shearing
julia: call me crazy but i think this fruit is making my teeth whiter!
natasha: oh jeez…what makes you say that?
julia: because i just looked in the mirror and my teeth look whiter!
After giving this much thought, I have come to the conclusion that the expression that one is simply “kidding themselves” is, in fact, a really cool idea. It is so often associated with negative qualities, feelings of delusional disillusionment and shame. For instance, “I thought he was into me but as it turns out, I was just kidding myself.”
I mean, the jokes on who here exactly? Your id? If you are kidding yourself about something in your life, I say keep on doing it! It is a metaphysical challenge to your own emotional bully, to acknowledge one’s own pattern of lying to oneself…it is a ridiculous concept. I say keep the lies coming. It is a murky reflection of your own sense of humor.
If you have the possibility to Yorick-ize a conundrum, then so may the crumbling chips of skull from the grand jester of humanity fall, and torment us onward. Later, when you’re dead, you can laugh about it over a glass of wine.
Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
I went to a play last night. My very talented actor friend (hey,we all need one) Charles Gould is currently performing in Exodus a play in the New York City International Fringe Festival. The play is about a new colony of non citizens who have been forced to the “fringe” of society (aka Kansas) and after generations made to create life anew in place called “Paradise”. Paradise, according to recent amendments to the Constitution, removes any rights and privileges these minorities once had in America,stripping them of their dignity and right to all things beautiful.
The play forcefully dabbles with dystopian idealism, the men working in factories to the likes of Sinclair, the library (the lab) a newly discovered hideaway is like a page out of Farenheit 451 and the women whom men are forbidden to speak with unless they are barren thrusts,needless to say, more cinematically towards Children of Men . Last, but not least, the Shepard’s, or the Paradise police stand in salute to the biggest of brothers from 1984.
What is cool about Exodus borrowing from other popular, and important, cultural reference points, is that it allows people like me from the audience to access the vision of personal revolution the narrative speaks to without the gravity usually proffered with other heavy handed forms of radical ideology. That is to say, because I get it, because I have heard it before in other ways, because there is a map of prescribed reason here, I am not excluded from understanding.
With that said, the narrative, like most, has a few loopholes one can’t help but notice. For instance, there is the only female character Mary, who must pose as a man to survive the life in paradise, but still the question remains as to why Mary must pose as a man in the first place? Is it a gendered compensation for the entire void of femaleness in the play, with all of the other women in the play silent, save for a final dueling dialogue?
Although a wonderful performance, there is a rape scene which is incredibly volatile and comes at a point in the narrative where the drama craves a crucial climax. We haven’t seen the brutality of Paradise until this point- and when we do it is mindfully abrasive; almost as if we need to see the flesh of a woman playing a man playing a woman and the all too real desperation of her struggle- to subscribe to the vision of this play.
Furthermore, the characters are prescribed one letter names, and yet the Old Man also provides Biblical names; for instance P becomes Peter. This to me was confusing, because if one character addresses the other one P instead of Peter, on stage this becomes muffled at points. Furthermore, I am not even sure when the transition from single letter names became full names, and vice versa.
Also, although the Biblical names serve as a neat thread and a unique portrayal of the blending of Church and State (which has become indivisible) it becomes nebulous for the viewer to figure out if the play wants us to see Abel as Abel brother of Cain, Mary as Mary mother of Christ and Peter as Peter the disciple. Or are these names merely a radical cover-up, a meaningless thread in the plot which creates a map of the conscientious constellation of characters?
And finally, by the play depleting its only hope for comic relief far too early, it oscillates back towards the didacticism many of us fear about revolution; which in my mind, should always be in one way or another, hilarious. At points post-intermission the drama, the yelling and bickering,bickering and yelling, was so intense I briefly felt as though I were home for Thanksgiving.
And yet, it is ultimately awesome that talented actors,writers,director and crew took the time to make a piece which was in the end provocative, and an essential tale for our troubled times.
Good news for you though, you can still go and see for yourself. Needless to say it is important to support your friends friends friends and their creative endeavors, tickets are cheap and post show beer is cheaper!
Davide and my gchat review:
i don’t pretend to be a green thumbed environmentalist but i have one question. why are there only 2 public recylcing receptacles in new york? in fact, i think they are both in union square (by the by, i invite someone to point out any other illusive NYC flagship recyclocons). i just don’t get it. don’t recycling bins which can be situated comfortably right next to trash cans make a lot more sense than I RECYCLE BOYS (witty though they remain) in the- careening towards passé faster than a fuel cell car fire-Green movement?
by the by the way, one time I saw two distinct women wearing I Recycle Boys t-shirts on the same day within a matter of hours. they looked a lot a like leading me to believe that who i assumed to be one woman had not only beaten me across town,but looked cool doing it. after a while though I realized it was probably just the fact that somehow TWO women purchased the SAME graphic tee and i was like those ladies are hotter than greenhouse gases.
why is it a good idea to read through backlogs of email when you have bigger fish to fry? reading and rereading old notes, some dripping with sentimental nods toward love and adulthood, some pasted with youtube link after youtube link, pictures, blurbs, words of the days, and reminders.
in the rubble of the spring, which i am just beginning to deal with now because it is nearly the end of summer (and i might be the only person i know who is excited) i found this note to Therese.
I am looking to move from Worcester soon, but sooner than that I would like to quit my job, although I still definitely need the money. I want to have a week or so here to kind of collect my thoughts, relax and say goodbye to this weird little dirt city that I have come to love so dearly. Sometimes things just move so quickly that you can only kind of notice this huge change on the fringe of your life and tell it to please be quiet until you have a minute to deal with it.
CHANEL is okay, I realized that the only way I can get through working at a mall, and a job I don’t really believe in is to try to just make it fun, and relax as much as possible. It is a good exercise in patience. I have a good friend who is about 60 year old Korean woman, her name is Carol and we dance a lot at work . Another girl Annabelle, who is a Ukranian rock and roller who loves hot topic just started. She tends to invade my space, and jokingly i tell her to back the fuck off. then I go home, and occasionally I drink and get stressed out and think about love and creativity and how we are all just floating through flowers.
and now i get to go haggle with student records- apparently clark NEVER dies! wee!
I miss you like crazy, even writing this email feels cathartic and connected.
I think about you every day, and i will send you some ho hos before your time in Africa ends.